Just Held.
“…God’s son holds them securely, and the evil one can not touch them.” 1 John 5:18
Low-grade anxiety, the hum of fear, the subtle bandwidth of things not being quite right, pervades this world. It is our zeitgeist. Often times, I feel afraid of the constant what ifs that swirl around my mind:
- What if people think I’m inadequate?
- What if I’m rejected again?
- What if my doom is a life of abject loneliness?
Then my mind starts to windmill, my heart race increases, and my mood darkens–thus low-grade anxiety and low grade depression.
It was in one of these moments that I recently prayed that God would help me see my situation from his perspective. I heard in my mind the still small voice of 1 John 5:18 yet again and God granted me a vision of two large hands overlapping themselves, palms faced up, cupping me in and Elohim’s strong paternal gaze looking attentively at me lovingly, intensely, and intentionally.
Tears and primordial sobs welled up inside and overflowed out of me as God’s truth washed over my inmost being: “you are held.”
I’m convinced that most of our anxieties surface from an insecure, wobbly, unfastened place in our souls. Little bolts in our personalities that’ve never been tended to and tightened. Lately, I’ve been meditating on the reality for the Believer–the reality that we are held. God’s hands surround and steady and fasten us. The bible is chock full of imagery concerning God’s hands:
- [Isa 62:3 NLT] 3 The LORD will hold you in his hand for all to see–a splendid crown in the hand of God.
- [Isa 64:8 NLT] 8 And yet, O LORD, you are our Father. We are the clay, and you are the potter. We all are formed by your hand.
- [Gen 2:7 NLT] 7 Then the LORD God formed the man from the dust of the ground. He breathed the breath of life into the man’s nostrils, and the man became a living person.
- [Col 1:17 NLT] 17 He existed before anything else, and he holds all creation together.
- [Gen 2:22 NLT] 22 Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib, and he brought her to the man.
The spirit and life behind these words have been steadying, prodding, coddling, chiseling, and comforting me because they are true. Truer than any words I’ve ever known. Holy Spirit is guiding me and embroidering these truths into the very fabric of my being and I encourage you, dear friend, to allow him to do the same for you.
One of the ways He is doing this is by teaching me to listen for and meditate on His voice. One helpful resource has been Mark Virkler’s teachings, which can be found here.
Love and light,
Kourtney Naomi
